Tag Archives: art of sex transmutation

May 20 2013

Sex By The River

Wet t-shirt from working out

If you look closely you can see I sweat fashionably.

Dear Har-old,

the water in the river is the emotion of sex.

the dam is the emotion of sex having no outlet.

the water flowing around the dam is the emotion of sex finding an outlet through physical channels.

masturbation and sex is water flowing downhill. the former kills productivity. only thing good about the latter is it’s the perpetuation of mankind. our kids! fortunately for you, you only have to worry about the former :)

the transmutation of sex energy to a creative outlet is water flowing uphill. capillary action takes will-power because it works against the law of gravity but the reward of riches at the top of the hill is worth the effort.

castration will take away your major source of action and will kill the fight in you. the beast. the animal. grrr! you don’t want that!

your precious dams will work for a while but the rain will stop that sunshine. the emotion of sex needs an outlet and they’re only 2: physical or creative. sex is low barrier and the fastest idea you can act on because of how strong and powerful the emotions are. so, imagine what would happen if you made that the driving force behind your occupation. spend half the time on it and see!

i always tell you to learn how to master your emotions, especially your anger. don’t kill nobody, alright! sex is your number one emotion. master that first. the other 13 are of lesser importance.

water is one of the main necessities of life. it cannot be defeated! you either drink the water and piss it out or pour it on you for growth.

if anybody got what it takes to be Har+new you do! Love you!

FY,

Har+new

Siblings:

 

Dec 1 2012

Creative Writing

Comedy Books. Dream Book. Hook Book. Poetry Books. Songs.

Comedy/Joke Books. Dream Books. Hook Books. Poetry Books. Songs.

If it is not transmuted into some creative effort it will find a less worthy outlet.

You know why you’re failing to transmute sex energy?

You haven’t identified a worthy outlet.

Remember your old outlet?

Poetry.

Raps.

Sitcoms.

Why did you stop in the first place?

Because it wasn’t making you any money?

Success isn’t measured in dollars alone. You know that.

Picking that pen back up will offer something more valuable than money now.

It will provide that creative outlet which you so desperately need.

I hate that you stopped in the first place and killed further writing progression, but, quite frankly, I believe you will be even better now and won’t start horribly.

Why?

Because of your communication and pitch practices.

On second thought, you have been writing all along.

Just never realized it :)

FY,

Har+new

P.S. Why don’t we create a new page for these writings? A little break from the concept :)

Aug 1 2012
Aside

Forgotten genius Nikola Tesla was celibate and never married claiming that his chastity was very helpful to his scientific abilities. He also believed that plant food was “superior to [meat] in regard to both mechanical and mental performance”. Respect the mind’s power over the body. Your head is on the top for a reason. Your mind is the software; your body the hardware. Think of yourself as an Apple product. What are Apple products? Well integrated! So, in order for your mind to give it’s best performance you have to watch what you put in your body (food) and careful about what you let out (sperm). The only thing standing between you and me is old habits. Kick ‘em! Who do you want to be, Bane from Batman & Robin or Bane from The Dark Knight Rises? You choose.

The Whole Widget Concept

Jan 17 2012
Aside

Remember when I said your apartment is putting you in danger? Then I alluded to a future letter on how, by the way, which is titled Why Walking Around The House Naked Is Overrated? Well, I wish I would’ve wrote that before the last four. I even tried writing it tonight, before midnight, before your first test. But it’s too late. She’s on her way. *sighs* But I don’t want to scare you with the word danger. To you, it’s probably not a danger at all. I mean, what do you care about being a Superman? Hmmm? Rather you want to admit it or not, THAT is a threat. THAT is your kryptonite. I’ll explain further in the aforementioned letter, but, it may be too little too late. I certainly hope not. On a lighter note, I love the new page Shorts. Update it frequently, Har-old.

Dec 12 2011

This Blog Sucks! It Doesn’t Have Any Sex In It!

And funny things, too. She’s got one up there that says, “Slippery When Wet.”

Dear Har-old,

Us three weeks ago:

Har+new: You know what’s wrong with this blog?!

Har-old: *too scared to answer*

Har+new: It sucks! It doesn’t have any sex in it!

Scene from Demolition Man:

Lenina Huxley: I was wondering if you would like to have sex?

John Spartan: [surprised] Here? With you? Now?

Lenina Huxley: [nervously, nodding] Mm-hmm.

John Spartan: Oh yeah!

[after futuristic, contact-free "sex"]

John Spartan: Look, Huxley, why don’t we just do it the old-fashioned way?

Lenina Huxley: [stands up, shocked] Eeewww, disgusting! You mean … *fluid transfer*?

Lenina Huxley: [stamping her foot] You are a savage creäture John Spartan, and I wish for you to leave my domicile now!

Har-old, here’s an excerpt of the first conversation my now wife and I had when we first met and the topic of discussion was sex:

Her: You wanna know why the traditional woman makes a man wait for sex?

Me: Why?

Her: Because she knows the typical man will lose interest in her afterwards. And everything before sex is nothing but hyping, promoting, marketing, advertising all her non-physical qualities. Her personality, her sense of humor, her intellect, her dreams and aspirations, her creativity, her ideas of fun, her imagination, you name it. And when she’s confident in those things then she haves sex and depending on how the guy acts afterward she knows how good of a job she did with her advertising. Most men rather have sex for the first time with a different woman than have sex the second time with the same woman.

Me: I hope I like and love you SO much one day that I never want to have physical sex with you!

Her: Haha! But, I do want to have kids one day, don’t you?

Me: Yeah, but, let’s make our first child a brainchild.

So, began, a sex life built on the foundation of two quotes: Andy Warhol’s “Never doing it is very exciting.” And  strippers’ “look but don’t touch” rule. What made this foundation solid was your persistence with your mind over matter (brains over beauty) philosophy when it came to the f gender. Do not stop thinking like that! Remember: The power of physicality is its potential to ruin everything. Now I’m not telling you to find the world’s smartest girl, however, the world’s ugliest girl, because physical features is the initial attraction … unless you’re online. By the way, wife is hot!

Har-old, you are NOT a John Spartan! There is no male presently living in your time who’s better prepared for futuristic, contact-free sex than you. You have po-ten-tial to master something at your age that man unconsciously puts to use in his 40′s. Notice I used po-ten-tial for you and unconsciously for them because you are fully aware of this great power. But being aware of it isn’t good enough. You must apply, constantly. Fortunate for you, you got me, to help you cheat. Read between the lines of Masturbating With Imagination, letters on patience, read The Art Of Sex Transmutation chapter, and sharpen your Eidetic memory. Most importantly, work on your child-like imagination because the future is ruled by it.

Why am I telling you this?

Because your apartment is putting you in danger!

How?

Stay tuned!

FY,

Har+new

P.S. I found my voice … again. About to sex this blog up.

Related Letters: