Reality TV (Episode 1, Scene 5)

Reality TV: 11+14+06

Lyric – Daddy’s home!!!

Summer – I brung you into this world, I can take you out.

Lil’ Harold – Muthafuck you!

Harold – Aight, what the hell is going on here?! Everybody sit they ass down, right now!

Lyric – Yeah, sit y’all ass down!

Harold – Listen. I feel like everythang that’s been going on these last couple days has been my fault. If I wouldn’t have sold our t.v.’s, none of this shit would be happening. It’s my fault why Lil’ Harold was about to get killed; it’s my fault why Lyric’s boyfriend dumped her; it’s my fault why you Summer baby tasted the future, so, therefore, I’m buying everybody a new entertainment system.

Summer – Hahaha

Lyric – Hahaha

Lil’ Harold – Hahaha

Harold – What the hell everybody laughin’ at?

Summer – Y’all we gotta tell him, we got to!

Harold – Tell me what???

Lyric – I’ll go first. Daddy, I don’t wear pampers. I’m secure wit the size of my ass and so is my boyfriend. I knew if you thought I was pregnant you would act a damn fool.

Lil’ Harold – Yeah, and daddy a man who lets the vacuüm cleaner suck his is a man wit a black girlfriend. I have a white girlfriend. You met Stephanie!

Summer – Yeah, and baby you was right … that was lotion in the vacuüm cleaner.

Harold – So everythang that happened I sold the t.v.’s was staged?

Summer – Yeah.

Harold – Y’all watch too much muthafuckin’ t.v.!

Lyric – So you mad?

Harold – Nah, I’m good. You know what, I’m not even gone take back the entertainment system thing. For entertaining me, I’ma give y’all entertainment back but can I get that more often??? I don’t like having a boring family. If I gotta take the t.v.’s again to have fun wit y’all, that’s what I’ma do. Now everybody get in on this family hug … and I’ma get y’all for fucking up my studio time!

*Roll Credits*

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