Girl Fight: 12+20+06
Jay Z – B if you keep shaking the bed I’m sleeping on the floor.
Beyonce – I’m sorry, J. I can’t sleep, baby! I have a lot on my mind.
Jay Z – Wel, tell me what’s on your mind so we both can go to sleep.
Beyonce – Okay, the new Destiny’s Child and Triple Threat albums are dropping tomorrow and there is so much at stake for both groups. The winners of the beef will be determined by whoever has the best first week meaning who sold the most and debuts at number one on the charts. I know Destiny’s Child is the best female R&B group as far as sales is concern but there is still a chance Triple Threat might sell more than us b-cuz fans are always rooting for the underdog and I fear that the most … losing! Jay are you listening to me???
Jay Z – Huh … yeah, yeah, I’m listening!
Beyonce – No, you not! You falling asleep!
Jay Z – I’m sleepy, B.
Beyonce – Well I’m finna tell you something that’s gone wake yo’ ass up … don’t you know the losers of the beef can’t release another album for 5 whole years!
Jay Z – What that gotta do with me?
Beyonce – You are included in the beef. You, Jermaine, and Nas … not just the girls.
Jay Z – Damn! So, if we lose, I’ma have to retire again? Damn!
Beyonce – Yeah, these next 7 days will be like waiting for a HIV test to come back.
*One week later*
Sway – Ladies, ladies, ladies, calm down! This is the moment you’ve all been waiting for, Destiny’s Child and Triple Threat. I’ve looked at the Sound Scan and I couldn’t believe my eyes so I know y’all won’t believe y’all ears. I thought it was a typo error but it wasn’t. Beyonce, like your man said, “Men lie, women lie, but number don’t.” So with that being said, the group that had the best first week sales was … NOBODY! Yes, I said NOBODY! The fans have spoken! Destiny’s Child and Triple Threat album sales combined is ZERO! If you don’t believe me, take a look at the paper.
Amerie – Omigod!!! Sway’s right! The fans have spoken! Don’t you see ladies – the fans are tired o this beef shit. Beef made us put together crappy albums, beef made the fans neutral, beef made us groups and I don’t like what beef does and if you guys don’t neither then the beef will be squashed right here, right now.
Rihanna – I’m happy everyone’s friends but we still have one problem … MICHAEL JACKSON HAS MY LITTLE BROTHER!
Janet Jackson – What you want us to do
Rihanna – Bitch you the main person who suppose to be doing something!
Janet Jackson – What I suppose to do?
Rihanna – You know what? You ain’t gotta do nothing … I’m finna do something cuz I know by now yo’ brother put his dick in my brother’s ass so I’m finna put a foot in his sister’s ass!