“Kids, I’m Not Carjacking Y’all, Ohh-tay?”

 

 

FADE IN

EXT. PARKING LOT – DAY

A man is walking away from a store. In the parking lot, he opens the passenger-side door on a car. He sees two kids in the backseat.

MAN

Oh, I’m sorry!

WOMAN

(screaming)

Hey! What are you doing?

MAN

I’m sorry, I thought this was my ….

WOMAN

(screaming)

He’s trying to steal my car with my babies inside!

MAN

What? No! I thought this was …

The woman pulls a gun out of her purse and runs in their direction. The man jumps on the hood of her car to get an overview of the parking lot in search of his ride. He doesn’t see it. When he looks down at the windshield he notices the woman left the keys in the ignition. The woman fires a shot at him. She misses. In a panic and without another choice, he jumps in her car and drives off.

MAN

Kids, kids, I’m not carjacking y’all. I. Am. Not. Carjacking. Y’all. Okay?

CHILD 1

Ohh-tay.

The woman shoots at the rear end of the car.

MAN

[pokes head out window] Your kids are in the car, you asshole!

The man pulls out his cellphone. 

FRIEND

Hello.

MAN

Where the hell are you?

FRIEND

I went across the street to pay my T-Mobile bill. I’m on my way back now.

MAN

I’m not there!

FRIEND

What you mean?

MAN

After you left, a car that looked just like yours pulled up in the parking spot.

FRIEND

That’s crazy!

MAN

I thought it was yours and opened the door. This woman came out the store screaming I was stealing her car.

FRIEND

Where are you now?!

MAN

In her car!!!

FRIEND

Huh?

MAN

She shot at me!

FRIEND

Shit!

MAN

There are kids in the backseat, dude!

Police sirens sound off. 

MAN

She called the cops! Meet me at MLK boulevard, where Selma hospital is. Kids …

CHILD 2

Yaaa?

MAN

I did not carjack y’all.

CHILD 1

Ohh-tay.

The man pulls over. The camera is from his POV now. He puts his hands over his eyes. When he takes his hands off his eyes the scene transitions with him sitting on the curb running his hands through his hair, thus finishing the motion. A second cop car pulls up, with the woman riding as a passenger. 

WOMAN

Where are my kids, you bastard?

OFFICER

They’re over there with my partner, mam.

WOMAN

Why is he just sitting on the curb and not in the back of y’all car? Arrest him!

OFFICER

We want to see if his story checks out. He said you and his friend have the same car. You got the same parking spot he had when he drove off to another parking lot.

MAN

She shot at me!

WOMAN

You believe that bull?

OFFICER

I’m sure this is a big misunderstanding,  but if your friend doesn’t pull up in a car that is her car’s twin you are going to jail, my friend.

MAN

I’m not lying! I told him to meet me here.

OFFICER

He’s taking an awful long time to. What’s his name?

A dozen people riding bicycles pass by. The one trailing behind the group stops and takes off their helmet. It’s his friend. 

MAN

FRIEND

Sorry, I’m late! You not gone believe what happened when I came back to the parking lot. Some guy saw my ‘for sale’ sign in the window and paid me 3 times what I was asking for. Then hit me with the ‘and one more thing’ and guess what that one more thing was [bounces the front tire]. Isn’t that awesome?

MAN

[looks at the sky] Nooooooo!!!

The scream is heard throughout the city. Distant people turn their heads. Flock of birds fly off. A dog laying down covers its ears. The guy who bought the friend’s car is at a red-light, smiling, listening to music at a low-level and wiping the dust off the dashboard when suddenly all the windows burst.  

FADE TO BLACK

 

 

Advertisements

2 thoughts on ““Kids, I’m Not Carjacking Y’all, Ohh-tay?””

Start/Join The Conversation ...

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s