Tag Archives: love

Computer Love <3

I typed H-E and paused by pressing the equal sign on the keyboard.

This was more than a blinking text cursor.

The other half was batting it’s eyelashes.

Was it flirting?

Flashing a lowercase L?

Or telling me I’m number one?

I pressed play by clicking the greater-than sign on the keyboard and proceeded to type A-R-T.

The word transformed into a picture of the word. It was a bigggggg heart. And I guess that’s what made the only thing move was the spinning beach ball, although, I wasn’t on the net.

Cursor stuck.

Cursing FUCK!

Freeze!

Froze.

Cold heart.

The mouse was just eating out of my palm, but now I’m jerking it back and forth like some string cheese.

It came to as I bowed over the desk and the arrow shot straight for the heart but because the cursor is tilted it missed.

Now the cursor is a small hand L gesture. What?! How am I a loser? I’m not responsible for the arrow being slanted. Hell, I don’t even shoot my gun sideways. I’ll leave that to your modern-day Robin Hoods. I wouldn’t try to attack the bottom of the heart with my pointer even with the heart looking like a bottom, if I may point out. I may cum across as anal paying attention to de-tails like that but fuck it!

Again, why should I have to rest an L on my forehead when there is already an S curled up there? Who am I? Clark Kent at The Daily Planet. If I throw up L then I gotta throw another L up. Laughing like shit ‘cause that’s like the bat-signal for you-know-who to roll on over to my cubicle, batting her eyelashes like Barbara Gordon. Aight, you keep doing that and your lashes gone get stuck in your eye, gone be blind as a bat. Aight, enough clowning around, let’s show my computer love like I-T.

We caps-locked lips. She lifted her foot off the ground. “Damn, her leg looks like an L.” My S curl became erect. Still a little crooked though.

Now the cursor is the rewind button, which is the less-than sign, neighboring the number 3.

We tilt our heads to the right when we’re trying to understand something.

“Understand?”

“Understood.”

To the beat.

This is our song. Let us have the floor, please.

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Unemployed Dream

My alarm clock is my cuddle buddy not in the bed the following morning

Going from a “hey big head” to a airhead, from a booty pillow to a bubble butt always wakes me up

Her schedule waits for no man

“Why you have me do the big spoon, little spoon when you knew you had to work?”

“Bear, I told you I had to get up at 6, and we did the butt ‘cheek-to-cheek.’ Remember you ripped the bedsheets with your big toe nail when we played footsie? Look!”

“Well, who was I hugging from the back?”

“Maybe your dream girl.”

“Describe her.”

“Unemployed.”

“…”

“Now baby I have to go. Your Captain Crunch is getting cold. It’s on the table, been sitting in the milk for 15 minutes which is long enough for it not to mess up the roof of your mouth. Now give me a kiss peace. A closed-mouth one though. You got morning breath. I don’t want to have to brush my teeth all over again. You know toothpaste makes me gag.”

“Me too.”

“What we don’t have in common?”

“Hmm. We’re not in the same bed right now.”

“What about now?”

“You’re leaning over the bed. Technically, no body part is in it.”

“Now?”

“You have a really pretty smooth sore-free, arrow-less left knee. Looks way better than mines. Butttttt there are a few body parts I think I like a little bit better.”

“Hmm. This one?”

“Wait. Wait. Before you sit your ass on the bed long enough to make a smiley face imprint you should remember one important thing … you have to go to work.”

“Haven’t you heard?”

“What?”

“I’m unemployed.”

A Thousand Kisses: A Poem For My Grandma

More Than A Grand: October 18, 2006

 

There are some people who live up to their name

Names like Jamie, Tracy, and Terry/Terri pass as bisexual names

Now there is a new name that will pass as a bisexual name

A name can tell a lot about a person’s character

Darnell **** is the grandparent who I live with

Darnell **** has 3 daughters, no sons, well until now

I feel like my mother and my auntees are my sisters

I don’t think I’ma son to my mother, I don’t think I’ma nephew to my auntees, I’m more of a uncle to my brothers, sisters, and my cousins, brother to my mother and auntees

And our mother is more like a sister to us

Darnell **** brings home the bacon like a man and cooks it like a woman

Darnell **** makes the money like a man and spends it like a woman

Darnell **** can dirty like a man and can clean like a woman

Darnell **** raised a son like a man and raised daughters like a woman

My grandma lives up to her name – Double D’s

HAPPY BIRTHDAY G’MA!!!

Constrained Writing Prompt: Write a poem with 8 words per line. Then write the same poem again, erasing 4 words per line. Do it once more, erasing 2 words per line. *Hidden Message*

National Institute Trial Advocacy (NITA) in Charlotte (CHA).

I hope they deliver goods like a carter.

Heard they love to teach you by doing.

NITA in Charlotte (CHA).

I deliver a carter.

Heard you love doing.

CHA NITA.

Carter I.

Love you.

Constrained Writing Prompt: Tell a love story, including a plant, in 5 sentences. 

They say you can’t turn a hoe into a …

Hel-i-cry-sum when I pansy how dandy that golden pothos would have looked in my kitchen. 

Jasmine, Heather, or whatever her name is rather daisy dukes than sunflower dress, have Poppy give her Black-eyed Susans when she didn’t come back with enough roses for her tulips. 

I wanted to go to the metal after the last petal was “she loves me knot” but my iris just stood there ox-eyed dazed. 

I wish I was as patient as a carnation and waited for a cherry to blossom ‘cause I gave a new meaning to deflower. 

Write A Story Using Only Numbers, and The Story Must Be Sad. Make Me Cry Using Numbers. Bonus Points If The Reader Can Translate It Into Words.

 1987 -
 1991 -
 10/09/2016
 1987 + 1991 = 2
 24/7/365 + 1
 1987 + 1991 = 1
 50/50
 777
 -0
 11/23 = 12/25
 07/19/2017
 1987 + 1991 x 2017 = 3
 1991 = 05/13/2018
 1987 = 06/17/2018
 08/08/2018 + 911
 2017 - 2018
 00   00
 11   11
 1987 + 1991 - 2017 = 2
 666
 1987 > 1991
 1991 > 1987
 1991/1987
 911
 1987 - 2020
 1987 + 777 = 20171987
 1991 ...
 911
 1991 - 2022
 1991 + 777 = 201719871991
 1