Tag Archives: relationships

“You got 100 likes for the first time” (temp post)

That was the message I woke up to this morning from YouTube. But wait, there’s more! I just crossed the 17K mark on my video. I have over 70 comments. And since the drop of this video I gained 24 more subs. And I’m receiving very nice comments from people telling me how they shared the video in different forums. Even a heart to heart with a person who said watching funny videos keep him from crying which matches why I make them in the first place. Yes, I’m doing this to eventually make money, but I wouldn”t love what I’m doing if I’m staying up all night until the next day editing videos without compensation. Right now the aforementioned activity is more valubale than money. I’m really emjoying this. It’s actually getting to the point where I am receiving so many back to back comments I’m thinking about turning notifications off as people are having heated debates. I should hit 20K by next Monday.

My WordPressident poem done and will post tomorrow. The 6 year anniversary of me writing Passport Bear is coming too.

Stay consistent in whatever you do!

One day soon I will post how I just hit the 100K mark … then million … then Google is my employer.

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Pleasure Bunny (Pleasing Bunz)

I like to … too
I like to … too
I like to, you
I want the DRAM (aye!)
But I get the drama
Wanna Sprite Cranberry
But I get the wine LeBron saved for year seven
Feed me the grape fresh out of surgery
Fan me with a marijuana leaf
Clip my toenails with your teeth
More than an hour-glass figure on the beach
The hour-glass is comprised of two bulbs don’t ya see?
Which represent the bright ideas in her career, she didn’t take two weeks
She give ‘em out, give it out, give it out, give it out, give it out, and I’m a hard worker to say the least (speech!)

Fuck me like a pornstar, be my pleasure bunny
Fuck me like a pornstar, say my pleasure honey
Fuck me like a pornstar, you put the U in cumming
Fuck me like a pornstar, keep the big O in coming

Fuck me like a pornstar, be my pleasure bunny
Stiff competition from millions of other sea men Easter egg hunting
But I won the sack race listening to Christian’s advice
Turn the other cheek, make sure you get my bad side

Try to log in
Scream my username
Forget the safe word
‘Fina can make it rain

Tell me you hate me
Run up my walls, make me
Run up the walls, run-away me
Ask me where I’m going, bring me back home safely
Wait a minute, let me get it together, boy, just break me
It’s soaking
I uhhh think you broke it
Throw in the towel
Ding-ding, I tap out (wow, just wow)

The sock on the door wasn’t the sock in his pants
Lick a sticky note and put it over the webcam
This icky ain’t for the world to see
This ain’t for the, this ain’t for the world
This icky ain’t for the world to see
This ain’t for the, this ain’t for the world
The tissue on her shoes wasn’t the tissue in her bra
Put out-of-order on the bathroom stall
This flood ain’t for the world to see
This ain’t for the, this ain’t for the world
This flood ain’t for the world to see
This ain’t for the, this ain’t for the world

It’s been a long day
She put the carrot in the wrong place
Pleasure Bunny please take Jack Frost away
Warm me up with creamy hot cocoa that’ll drive me loco
I can melt in your hand, I can melt in your mouth, where you want it?
She said the rabbit hole and I condoned it
We made ourselves a little elf
It’s been a long time coming, let’s take that off the shelf

That’s a big eggplant emoji you sent boyyyyy
text text text
That’s a noice phat peach emoji you sent girrrrrrl (grrrrr)
text text text

Take my shirt off, around my hand twist it
Like a helicopter over my head spin it
Smack my freak-a-leak on the ass with it
You better get, get, gone and get it
This one’s for you, this one’s for who?
Us-us-us (get some!)

Please Leave Me Alone

Suicidal thoughts
Do they always talk?
Do they ever listen?
Can I be happy for 5 minutes?
Please leave me alone
Go bother someone else, no, don’t
Because it makes my heart shatter
To read about McKenzie Adams
Are you mad this poem I wrote
Before your little suicide note
Please leave me alone
Don’t you see me on the phone?
Talking to a stranger about you
I know it’s the easy way out, cool
I must admit
Your kind of thinking is attractive
I think about you twice a day, you’re a habit
I wanna kick you, not the bucket
So many things I wanna do on that list, number 15,418 you will love it
Can you at least leave me alone in public?
Especially when I’m at work
I know you think I’m only saying that because I’m an introvert
I know I ain’t nobody’s daddy but Su’
I’m somebody’s son, someone’s brother, Ant and Chh uncle
He wants to live with me and play video games
But I can’t even take care of myself, oh what a shame
They say every time somebody die a child is born
I really thought about doing it on my birthday but got a text that left me torn
Of all days my niece came into the world
And I didn’t wanna rob her of that bond on her future birthdays, just yesterday your mama was my little girl
Can you hear that you suicidal maniac?
Can you leave me alone now?
All you heard was my zodiac?
If I don’t do it the cancer will attack?
Now … why you had to go and remind me of that?
If you was a person I would call you mean
If you was a person I would call you me (And!)

Remaining posts for 2018:

  • Pleasure Bunny (December 21st @ 9PM)

  • Sidewalks of New York: Part 2 (New Years Eve)

Wedding Ring In The Gym Bag 💍💼

Wedding ring in the gym bag /
While I knock beach sand out the punching bag /
With the finger the tan line is at

I didn’t get on 1 knee to make you get on 1 knee to kiss a ring you bought with your wealth /
You said you will love me through sickness and health /
So I thought your heart-shaped lips clicking the waistline of my ring finger would stop it from looking pale /
Lightskin, lightskin, well, wail, whale

You don’t care about the muffin top on my ring finger, you care about the one that’s on my body /
You worked it out in your head “the only time a man takes his wedding ring off is in the gym” to see if he still got it

Sloppy or hottie, I never let ‘em see me sweat /
After we got married, I stopped singing on the treadmill so can’t another woman tell you how my voice sound when I’m talking during sex /
Yes! Yes! Yes!

Ain’t believing nothing I say I see /
Mobile around my mobile when I’m not local, hacking my iPhone’s Face ID

So know when I ask you who you gone be for Halloween I’m going to town /
Be like me, fling your ring when you go ding ding and find out life’s a beach when you drown /
Some Dundee put in quicksand when I left out /
And you want me to help pull you up but wanna be picky about /
Which hand I use like I’m the butler from Hell’s House /
I’m a big boy, I can watch Scary Movies by myself now

Deuces

Mama You Can Do It

Sitting on the kitchen floor in my panties and tee its 3:54 in the morning
Eating ice cream with the refrigerator door halfway open
I’m hoping my daughter don’t walk-in on me rummaging through the trash, no, no, no
Rum age? What I’m looking for is 2 days old
Wednesday and Thursday marked out on the calendar but so
I’m about to lose this game of tic tac toe, oh ohhhhhh

Mama you can do it
Please just go back to bed
Before you end up puking
I’ll hold your hair if it comes to it
And if you must sleep by the toilet
Little spoon will hug you from the back
You can tuck me in again when you’re sober
No, you can’t come in my friend, mama said no hangovers

Dad, I know what you are thinking
But this time mama wasn’t drinking
She swerved to avoid hitting a wolf
I wish she did after what it did to little red riding hood
We spared its life
Least it could do is stop these pigs from treating my mama like a kid, saying ABC’s, walking in a straight line

Mama you can do it, do it, do it, do it

Big Spoon and Little Spoon Get a Room (Pillow Talk)

When you talk about bringing home the bacon you my tablespoon

When you talk about in sickness and in health “say yes” you my soup spoon

When you talk about raising our babies you my silver spoon

When you talk about talk is cheap and basic you my plastic spoon

When you talk about shit that they did you my teaspoon

When you talk about things that me squint like Asians you my Chinese spoon

When you talk about no other worm gets your fish baited you my salt spoon

When you talk about being decorated in your occupation you my souvenir spoon

When you talk about retiring from our dream vocations you my caddy spoon

When you talk about your breast I’m patient you my grapefruit spoon

When you talk about waking up to each other every morning breath smelling like “say less” you my coffee spoon

When you talk about whatever it’s always on beat with my heart you’re amazing you my love spoon

FY,
Har+new

Kiss Peace

I’ll Call Your Name When You Vacuum (WordPressident #14)

Image via @TheSims
I’m blowing text text text in bubbles,
They tell ya failure,
I’m in trouble,
Swimming 6 feet is a struggle,
Hasselhoff hustle hustle,
You say you, you know me
Blue-blue-blue, blue-blue-blue, blue-blue … blue
Mr. Blankman finish my sentence for me
Started with me wanting the boys to wonder, “Is her bikini bottom real?”
Ends with me finding out Bikini Bottom’s real
Hello, hell low
Sharks circling SquarePants is The Shape Of Water, acute
I am fibbing on the triangles and should octagon before they channel me into a mute
Turn it up mama your baby on TV blink at 182
When I go Down Under tell my little sister I went to Australia and when the water changes color tell my little brother I pee’d in the pool
I love you, you and you
And I promise I’ll see you all very soon
Next time you clean your room
I’ll call your name when you vacuüm
Whatever you do, don’t go looking for me in the front or you’ll be the one living in a vacuüm
Boom!
It’s not over until the fat lady sings
“In your Krispy Kreme dreams”
Boom boom room!

FY,

Har+new

Kiss Peace 💋 🕊